In God's Whole Plan

I am emotional, I am totally happy, I am starting to believe. I believe that I will be bringing home a baby this summer. I believe that all the tears I cried, all the years I waited, it was worth it. Because i would have NEVER felt this much gratefulness and graditude. This baby was my dream, my fantasy, my desire. I surrendered all for this baby, and guess what, nothing can make me stop praising the lord for this blessing..... this blessing that people said was IMPOSSIBLE without medical intervention. This blessing that had under a 4% chance of coming true. Our baby, our beautiful baby.....

I can't start to tell you what he does to you (God), Someday I'll understand in God's whole plan because I see it all in my baby......

Handful of Cheerios

It's not just breakfast anymore.

I have not been able to eat happily since 5.5 weeks of pregnancy, absolutely nothing food wise appeals to me, or at least makes my mouth water. The simple task of chewing, makes me gag. Morning sickness, Afternoon sickness, Evening sickness... sickness all because. My doctor thinks it's normal, perfectly fine, as I eat the equalvalent of 5 bowls of cherrios (without the milk, because while I LOVE drinking milk, it makes my mouth so friggin dry now) throughout the day, juice and water, I'm able to add in an ensure, which is perfect for those of you that are like me and don't really mine drinking, but hate chewing and swallowing. My pregnancy by the way, is going excellent. I've lost 10 lbs at 11 weeks, but once again that's normal, I'm not eating my high powered junk food and I'm taking in small portions. So all and all, that's a healthy move. Is it September yet?

The Blog Where I Say.... "Doh"

"You're showing"
"You are showing"
"OMG look at your belly"

I'm bloated, I'm ten weeks pregnant, you ain't seen NOTHING yet. So sorry guys if I left you in a standstill, I can't find my wireless card and therefore I can only write blogs at home, when I'm not puking or sleeping. Nothing new here, Valentine's day rocked, and I have the sexiest, sweetest hubby.... but hey, those are givens.

Run, Puke, Rinse, Repeat

I've had morning sickness since 5 weeks and 5 days..... but guess what!! C'mon Guess!! I puked yesterday, my first real puke, I was in a resturant in the urge of running came to mind, I totally puked in the sink, and I was so proud, (I'm soooo weird and gross, I know) I ran back to the table like babe I puked, my first puke, yay!! and Then I ate the remainder of my dinner =)

Then this morning, after popping my prenatal, I puked again.... I am, so excited about puking, yea, I'ma weird mommy....

Friday's appointment was fab, baby measurements are perfect 8 weeks 4 days, and the heartrate... you ready for this? 180BPM!!! the little one was just playing around and dancing "like look mommy, my arms and hands are here now, LOOOOKK at me"....

Welp....that's it..... time to take my 10th nap for today...

No matter how gross I feel, I LOVE BEING PREGNANT....and more importantly .... I LOVE THIS BABY!!

An Angry Preggo...

My boss is an ass....

I've said it before, but now I mean it.

If you can tell a top performer this, "You have the best performance, but your job can be eliminated though" or this "You won't be getting a raise (again) because you make enough money at your age". He was lucky I needed my paycheck for the next 6 months or I would of gotten up and kicked his ass.

Same person who "unannoucingly demoted"(meaning he doesn't invite me to management events, even though I was hired as a manager and at the time had a staff) me to a non-manager.

Same person who ass I covered 100% of the time, but listen up, your ass will be totally cold now....

WTF??

Mind you this is NOT the boss that hired me, just a fraction of that person.

So yeah, I'm not welcomed back after maternity leave, if I still have a job then, but for some reason I don't care either way......

Homesick Rant....

When we bought this house, I though it was great. It was a pretty big house, in a really nice neighborhood, had I known house prices would go down this much in 2 months, we would of waited, I would have waited. We live too far. Even though DH says, it's only an hour away, he's not a female, he's a male, I am the one who you know, has to plan ahead. Now that I'm pregnant I realize how much more help I am going to need and how limited our funds are. DH's job has him travelling 20-25 weeks a year, I currently work full-time, and by a very slim amount (3,000) I am the breadwinner, there is no way I can do a 1 1/2 hour commute to and from work and then work a 8-9 hour day as a mother, right now I wake up at 6:00 a.m. and get home if lucky at 6:00 p.m., I shower and go to sleep, I'm typically too dayum tired for dinner and I maybe get to speak to my mother on the phone if I'm not zoned out by 9:00 p.m. Imagine when our infant comes, I intend to breastfeed for 3 months, so yeah, I anticipate not sleeping either. My mother is going to sit for us for free. But we've waited so long for a baby, I can't bear to think that I have to work 40+ hours and not see the baby then, I'm honestly beat with the commute to work and the boredom of my job. In my mind, I've decided to work part-time at the most. It's unfair to me to be the sole caregiver and then work 40+ hours on what, maybe 3 hours of sleep, on top of that I'm going back to school for my graduate degree. I feel that if our bills do not get paid, since my husband thinks everything is fine and dandy, he can work a weekend job to pay them. To further this, I've decided to conslidate my bills to get a lower car insurance, and to really budget, I've been doing well with this so far. my goal is to get all my bills low, and perhaps I'll work full-time again in 2011. But I am so not pushing myself, I am so not.

My Baby Has Fans!

Remember when I told you my step father was being a total jerk about my pregnancy, well it comes to find out he was only trying to protect my feelings, as he knows how hard we've been trying and how scary pregnancy is, he is also old fashion and I had to ummm, remind him that our kiddo was conceived after marriage....well I saw them this weekend and get this...

They've painted their spare bedroom for the baby...lol....they keep calling the baby our baby and my step father keeps trying to give away things he thinks babies like, lol. It was so cute.... I felt so much better....

My husband and his family have been blowing me kisses on the phone and are giving us EVERYTHING and ANYTHING.... which is HELLA SWEET!!

Hey little baby, you got ALOT of people waiting for you!