A Semi-Weight goal is a weight that may just be a healthy and maintainable weight for you or you may still need to lose 5-10 more pounds, but you won't know which one it is until you get to your weight. My Semi-Weight loss goal is 145lbs, I remember being that weight before and it was okay, and my clothes fit good, but not awesome and if my memory serves me right, I was trying to diet back then. So with that being said, my lifetime goal is 135 lbs, because for the majority of my lifetime, I've always thought that was a great weight for my bone structure and awesome curves.
In other weight news, I have the beginnings of a waist. YAYY!! yes, you can see a beautiful waist forming and I am looking more hourglass then apple, I can't remember ever having a waist, and even though it's on top of a fat tummy, my waist looks great...lol
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Hey I Figured Out My Password
It's been a long time.
I am around and I have constantly thought about blogging, but somewhere in life I forgot. As I read my past blog posts, I am a tad bit discouraged to see that I've ventured pretty much nowhere from where I wanted to be, but a tad bit okay with that, that I can see I've matured and yet, have not lost myself. For me, that's important. There's alot to discuss, a lot to talk about, but I won't be going anywhere anytime soon so I have time to collect my thoughts =)
looking forward to it too.
I am around and I have constantly thought about blogging, but somewhere in life I forgot. As I read my past blog posts, I am a tad bit discouraged to see that I've ventured pretty much nowhere from where I wanted to be, but a tad bit okay with that, that I can see I've matured and yet, have not lost myself. For me, that's important. There's alot to discuss, a lot to talk about, but I won't be going anywhere anytime soon so I have time to collect my thoughts =)
looking forward to it too.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
I'm Around...
At times I'm known to vanish, it's been difficult adjusting to the parent/wife/executive/graduate student thing. Just when I think I have it together, it explodes. Today, well right now is a good day. Losing weight is a struggle in itself, as after a baby, well in my case, you hormones shifted and losing weight fast is a think of the past, now mine you, I am only 25 lbs from goal weight, but that's after strategic meal planning and working out, and frankly, I don't have the time with a HIGH energy newborn to do too much. I've been focusing on her and slide in my free time here and there, I mean, she's the love of my life, she didn't ask to be here, so she comes first. Having a traveling husband doesn't help either, because I feel like I need to "overcompensate". Urghs... but that's another story, for another blog title.
So what did I miss while I was gone?
So what did I miss while I was gone?
Friday, February 5, 2010
Fat Actress
I am approximately 35 pounds over my ideal weight, I am 16 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight, and I can not fit any of my clothing, argh!! Please note I have a VERY expensive line of clothing and I can not afford to buy more clothing,I have to go on a low carb/ low fat diet and work out 1 hour on the treadmill 5 times a week, weight lift 3 times a week, and ab workouts every other day of approximately 500 reps.
In order to be at goal by December 31, 2010.... ARGHS!
<---To the gym I go =(
In order to be at goal by December 31, 2010.... ARGHS!
<---To the gym I go =(
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
You Don't Understand!
My little cousin, baby was born today, she's fifteen, this pregnancy was due in part by bad child rendering on her mother's part, as children are sponges and they imitate bad behavior, and part of her wanting to obtain "love" from a little person.... There was ALOT of things she viewed as a young teen, that she shouldn't have been able to, once again, children imitate bad behavior especially when it's plenty to go around.
When the pregnancy was discovered, her parents wanted abortion, the boy's parents said it wasn't his and he has all but disappeared from the face of the earth, I advocated adoption (and still do), and then we found out that she was 19 weeks pregnant, and the parents kinda.. MADE her keep the baby...and shipped her down to a more responsible adult, "more responsible" in their opinion. We were runners up an recieving the teen, but due to the following facts:
1. we lived in the same state as them and the secret would be found out
2. We are church goers, and getting up early on the weekend isn't their cup of tea
we were passed over.... Oh yea, I'm not making this up...
It's difficult to help a new mother understand what is the right thing to do with their child (hey, I know that for a fact), so imagine trying to help a know it all fifteen year old. It got so bad, that "Kelsey" screamed, "Babies are too much work", to my reply of, "Well, this is just day one, Kelsey, what did you expect", Aunt Angie, you don't understand!! Kelsey said, to my reply of "I'm a new mother, I understand, and hopefully soon you will too".
When the pregnancy was discovered, her parents wanted abortion, the boy's parents said it wasn't his and he has all but disappeared from the face of the earth, I advocated adoption (and still do), and then we found out that she was 19 weeks pregnant, and the parents kinda.. MADE her keep the baby...and shipped her down to a more responsible adult, "more responsible" in their opinion. We were runners up an recieving the teen, but due to the following facts:
1. we lived in the same state as them and the secret would be found out
2. We are church goers, and getting up early on the weekend isn't their cup of tea
we were passed over.... Oh yea, I'm not making this up...
It's difficult to help a new mother understand what is the right thing to do with their child (hey, I know that for a fact), so imagine trying to help a know it all fifteen year old. It got so bad, that "Kelsey" screamed, "Babies are too much work", to my reply of, "Well, this is just day one, Kelsey, what did you expect", Aunt Angie, you don't understand!! Kelsey said, to my reply of "I'm a new mother, I understand, and hopefully soon you will too".
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Small Fry...
This morning as I was taking my brother to school, I witnessed a group of kids picking on a smaller child, my heart, broke. I immediately jumped in and stopped the argument, I chasitized the children for doing this to someone, and I asked the young boy if he was okay. His face, okay, it broke my heart. I can not stand, at all, for anyone to be injuried or hurt, when I think of teaching, I think of his helpless face. Children, they can be so cruel, so friggin cruel, education shouldn’t be that way, it should be helpful, not harmful. How can I help those that need me….
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Thinking Of Others....
I deleted my post from yesterday, I was very upset that an "anon" reader of my blog would classify me as not being infertile enough. Only god can judge me and so I then realized, perhaps this person is where I was a year ago, bitter, angry and confused, perhaps their only way to cover the pain is to post nasty comments to others they feel are not worthy. and for that, I pity 'anon' and I hope that peace reaches their heart soon.
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Please Keep Bonnie and her family In Your Thoughts...
I'm really sad right now.... I'm thinking of Bonnie and her family and my heart is very heavy.
Bonnie is a elegant blog writer, I her blog encouraged me to write my own.
Bonnie, just like us, went through years of infertility, failed IUI's and IVF's..... Her family open their hearts to adoption and the little boy was born on 12/1/2009, however, yesterday afternoon, they recieved bad news....
Please keep her in your thoughts...
icanhazbebe.blogspot.com
Bonnie is a elegant blog writer, I her blog encouraged me to write my own.
Bonnie, just like us, went through years of infertility, failed IUI's and IVF's..... Her family open their hearts to adoption and the little boy was born on 12/1/2009, however, yesterday afternoon, they recieved bad news....
Please keep her in your thoughts...
icanhazbebe.blogspot.com
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Statistically Screwed
I had a new blog, but the passion just wasn’t there. I found myself writing once and a while, which is odd for me, the advent writer I am. I realized that even though this blog started off as showcasing my battle with infertility and pregnancy afterwards, that it was still a big part of me. Infertility, that is. I can not and should not mask it just because I was given a 4% chance to have a baby and achieved it. I have spent countless hours contemplating what my greatest contribution would be medicine or business, ahh, I am so good with both. So I am back, I am back with a lot on my mind, so take a seat, you may be here for a long while =)
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
A Little Infertile's Birth Story
I want to say that God blessed me with years of infertility only to be grateful and apperciative of my gift, our daughter, I thank him everyday for her.
I had my 40 week doctor's appointment on 9/14 (my due date), I totally intended to beg for an induction, as my husband only will be home for the next two weeks and I really didn't wanna go over and risk the chance of my husband not getting the proper amount of bonding time with the baby. Before our appointment, I did alot of housecleaning, washing dishes, cleaning the bathroom. I fully expected that I would get an induction date only, prolly for 9/16. Right before the appointment DH and I stopped for chinese food and off to the doctor's appointment we went. I was surprised to find out that I gained 5 lbs, in a week, which is pretty odd as I was full term. Next the nurse did my blood pressure which was 130/90, I only had a small trace of protein and no glucose but when the doctor came in and did my blood pressure it was 140/90. He said that this is the game plan changer, and I said I'm all for pitocin! and he said yeah, I'm sending you to L&D and that he was going to let the on call doctor know. So me and DH happily made our way to L&D, DH was in a total daze (nervous huh!!) We got to L&D which thank god was only 3 minutes from the doctors office, They took blood and put me on my left side for Blood Pressure. I was so excited that I was going to finally have my little girl, but here's the thing, MY BLOOD PRESSURE WAS FINE and went down, my blood work was fine and I totally thought they were going to send me home. I started crying a little and was so upset. But then the nurse came in and said, hey do you feel all those contractions, I said what? She said when was the last time you were checked, I said in the office I was 3cm/100% she said that's all I need to know and that she's going to check me and if I'm still there I'm going to have a baby in the morning!! I was so happy!! She checked me and I was 3cm 70% and I was admitted. I was having a baby!!! I went to the birthing room where I was given a low dose of oxytocin (I was already in active labor and a low dose had me contracting every 2 minutes) the doctor came in at 5:25 (about 10 minutes after I got admitted)checked me and I was at 4cm and 70% (1cm in 10 minutes cool), He broke my water and omg, the pain started, he took away the cushion...lol....I happily begged for an epidural and got it, I was able to sleep on and off through the night (which I totally suggest preggo moms cause you need that energy) I was dialiting kinda slow, at 11:00 p.m. I was 6cm, I graduately effaced and the doctors realized that this was going to be one big baby when I stalled for 2.5 hours at 9cm. Finally at 5:45 a.m. I was 10cm/100% but a station -2!! WTF!! they called my doctor to come and finally at 6:30 a.m. I was 10cm/100% and a station +2 (phhheehh) I thought I had it made, until, I realized the PAIN of pushing, OMG there's no epidural in the world to stop that pain, for 1 hour and 45 minutes I was in pushing HELL. finally her little head popped out and let me tell you, that's some COOL shyt, seeing her head come out my body, well that just created this instant little bond!!! I was so focused and pushed her out. The doctor and nurse said OMG.... she is HUGE.... they put her on my stomach and all I could say was omg I love you sot much, thank you for being my daughter!! they weighted her and she was 9lbs 1oz and 21.25 inches, yeah, thanks alot for that fetal growth estimator that said she was only 8lbs 3lbs (at the most). She is awesome, she's a good latcher, a bit painful but good latcher...but I'm not producing enough o maintain her weight so she's on the bottle (which is fine) Once my milk comes in I'm going to start pumping and bottle feeding her (I realize that just like this baby making think, baby raising is a give and take thing, it will not be perfect)
So that's my birth story and here's my daughter!!
I had my 40 week doctor's appointment on 9/14 (my due date), I totally intended to beg for an induction, as my husband only will be home for the next two weeks and I really didn't wanna go over and risk the chance of my husband not getting the proper amount of bonding time with the baby. Before our appointment, I did alot of housecleaning, washing dishes, cleaning the bathroom. I fully expected that I would get an induction date only, prolly for 9/16. Right before the appointment DH and I stopped for chinese food and off to the doctor's appointment we went. I was surprised to find out that I gained 5 lbs, in a week, which is pretty odd as I was full term. Next the nurse did my blood pressure which was 130/90, I only had a small trace of protein and no glucose but when the doctor came in and did my blood pressure it was 140/90. He said that this is the game plan changer, and I said I'm all for pitocin! and he said yeah, I'm sending you to L&D and that he was going to let the on call doctor know. So me and DH happily made our way to L&D, DH was in a total daze (nervous huh!!) We got to L&D which thank god was only 3 minutes from the doctors office, They took blood and put me on my left side for Blood Pressure. I was so excited that I was going to finally have my little girl, but here's the thing, MY BLOOD PRESSURE WAS FINE and went down, my blood work was fine and I totally thought they were going to send me home. I started crying a little and was so upset. But then the nurse came in and said, hey do you feel all those contractions, I said what? She said when was the last time you were checked, I said in the office I was 3cm/100% she said that's all I need to know and that she's going to check me and if I'm still there I'm going to have a baby in the morning!! I was so happy!! She checked me and I was 3cm 70% and I was admitted. I was having a baby!!! I went to the birthing room where I was given a low dose of oxytocin (I was already in active labor and a low dose had me contracting every 2 minutes) the doctor came in at 5:25 (about 10 minutes after I got admitted)checked me and I was at 4cm and 70% (1cm in 10 minutes cool), He broke my water and omg, the pain started, he took away the cushion...lol....I happily begged for an epidural and got it, I was able to sleep on and off through the night (which I totally suggest preggo moms cause you need that energy) I was dialiting kinda slow, at 11:00 p.m. I was 6cm, I graduately effaced and the doctors realized that this was going to be one big baby when I stalled for 2.5 hours at 9cm. Finally at 5:45 a.m. I was 10cm/100% but a station -2!! WTF!! they called my doctor to come and finally at 6:30 a.m. I was 10cm/100% and a station +2 (phhheehh) I thought I had it made, until, I realized the PAIN of pushing, OMG there's no epidural in the world to stop that pain, for 1 hour and 45 minutes I was in pushing HELL. finally her little head popped out and let me tell you, that's some COOL shyt, seeing her head come out my body, well that just created this instant little bond!!! I was so focused and pushed her out. The doctor and nurse said OMG.... she is HUGE.... they put her on my stomach and all I could say was omg I love you sot much, thank you for being my daughter!! they weighted her and she was 9lbs 1oz and 21.25 inches, yeah, thanks alot for that fetal growth estimator that said she was only 8lbs 3lbs (at the most). She is awesome, she's a good latcher, a bit painful but good latcher...but I'm not producing enough o maintain her weight so she's on the bottle (which is fine) Once my milk comes in I'm going to start pumping and bottle feeding her (I realize that just like this baby making think, baby raising is a give and take thing, it will not be perfect)
So that's my birth story and here's my daughter!!
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Hey, There's A Baby In This Room
BabyBell was born yesterday morning!!After 16 hours of labor and 1.5 hours of pushing, let me just tell you how much I love epidurals....Why you may ask?
Oh because my daughter who was not overdue, weighted nine pounds and one ounce......lol
Birth story to follow!
Oh because my daughter who was not overdue, weighted nine pounds and one ounce......lol
Birth story to follow!
Sunday, September 13, 2009
To The Little One That Hasn't Exited
Hello my beautiful little girl,
today is the last day of cooking in medical terms, tomorrow is your due date. It's been a ride hasn't it? (insert my tears while writing this) I remember on January 4th, when I saw a spot of red on my toilet paper, it would of marked a year of TTC and many many months of not preventing, I cried inside and I begged God that my period would not start, and guess what? It didn't, nope, it didn't come that Monday or that Tuesday. By Weds I thought the world was playing an evil joke on me. So I went to lunch with my work buddy and stopped at Drug Fair for a pregnancy test. Now baby, I've seen SO MANY negatives, that I was in no rush to POAS, I actually went and did reception. Around 3:30 I got the nerve, I went in the first stall and peed, I watched the stick, IMMEDIATELY there was a line...omg...omg...omg... I said, the test line showed up before the control. I walked in a daze to my office, and wrote your daddy an e-mail, OH GOD!!! we were OVERJOYED I sent him the picture of the pregnancy test! I called Grandma who cried on the phone, and Grandpa and Uncle E, the men they are were cautiously happy. I made an appointment to see the ob/gyn, and on 1/21 (my grandmother's birthday R.I.P) we went to the doctor, and we saw you, we saw our baby, Daddy was so happy that he started calling everyone immediately!! I called Mom and said it's a healthy little baby!! Shortly after you made your presence known, Puking and sleeping and a CRAZY aversion to any poultry (argh)... I was all for the ultrasounds and tests.
No offense little babygirl, but we thought you were a boy. Then, on April 21st, we found out we were having a sweet little girl!!! You made it REALLY clear that you had a vay-jay-jay. As the ultrasound tech moved the wand, you pushed up your privates so they could be in every photo. Oh you silly little girl!!! Daddy and Mommy ran out that weekend and got lilac paint and painted your room, we even put up Tinkerbell boarder.
Pregnancy, thought it was tiring, though I lost ten pounds and gained it plus 30 back. It was worth it, you were the miracle that no one knew was possible.
We have been waiting for you, for two weeks now, and honestly we're getting a little bored with being in the house. Now don't get it confused, mommy and daddy love either other very much, however the bassinet in our bedroom is empty, we need you, we wanna hold you. Grandma and Grandpa keep looking at us longingly, where is their first grandchild!!!
And while I enjoy you moving in my tummy, the selfish act that I get to have with just you and I, I am ready to share you with the world.
So please little momma, don't forget to come out, we promise to make your world filled with love and sunshine. Why? because we loved you before you were even created =)
today is the last day of cooking in medical terms, tomorrow is your due date. It's been a ride hasn't it? (insert my tears while writing this) I remember on January 4th, when I saw a spot of red on my toilet paper, it would of marked a year of TTC and many many months of not preventing, I cried inside and I begged God that my period would not start, and guess what? It didn't, nope, it didn't come that Monday or that Tuesday. By Weds I thought the world was playing an evil joke on me. So I went to lunch with my work buddy and stopped at Drug Fair for a pregnancy test. Now baby, I've seen SO MANY negatives, that I was in no rush to POAS, I actually went and did reception. Around 3:30 I got the nerve, I went in the first stall and peed, I watched the stick, IMMEDIATELY there was a line...omg...omg...omg... I said, the test line showed up before the control. I walked in a daze to my office, and wrote your daddy an e-mail, OH GOD!!! we were OVERJOYED I sent him the picture of the pregnancy test! I called Grandma who cried on the phone, and Grandpa and Uncle E, the men they are were cautiously happy. I made an appointment to see the ob/gyn, and on 1/21 (my grandmother's birthday R.I.P) we went to the doctor, and we saw you, we saw our baby, Daddy was so happy that he started calling everyone immediately!! I called Mom and said it's a healthy little baby!! Shortly after you made your presence known, Puking and sleeping and a CRAZY aversion to any poultry (argh)... I was all for the ultrasounds and tests.
No offense little babygirl, but we thought you were a boy. Then, on April 21st, we found out we were having a sweet little girl!!! You made it REALLY clear that you had a vay-jay-jay. As the ultrasound tech moved the wand, you pushed up your privates so they could be in every photo. Oh you silly little girl!!! Daddy and Mommy ran out that weekend and got lilac paint and painted your room, we even put up Tinkerbell boarder.
Pregnancy, thought it was tiring, though I lost ten pounds and gained it plus 30 back. It was worth it, you were the miracle that no one knew was possible.
We have been waiting for you, for two weeks now, and honestly we're getting a little bored with being in the house. Now don't get it confused, mommy and daddy love either other very much, however the bassinet in our bedroom is empty, we need you, we wanna hold you. Grandma and Grandpa keep looking at us longingly, where is their first grandchild!!!
And while I enjoy you moving in my tummy, the selfish act that I get to have with just you and I, I am ready to share you with the world.
So please little momma, don't forget to come out, we promise to make your world filled with love and sunshine. Why? because we loved you before you were even created =)
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Argh!!
I have a "friend" (please note quotes, as I honestly don't have friends IRL, because I am way too judgemental -insert sarcastic look). Who tends to think of themself ALOT. they wanted to visit, okay, not visit, they wanted to stay a week with me and we agree on late October, as my husband and I did not want guests until we got a baby routine down. I told her that coming anytime sooner would be a waste as I am not totally mobile everyday...She informs me last week that she will be coming this week and if she can stay with us. Umm no... this is not a good time, we are back and forth at doctors and trying to enjoy the LAST LITTLE BIT OF OUR TWOSOME. (selfish? dayum right). Plus I have been havin wicked pains and I enjoy sleeping until 9..10....and 11am. I'm sorry, but at 39 weeks, I really don't want to play host to any guests, I just want to go to my doctor's appointments, take walks with my husband, spend time with my mom, watch television and read books, I mean, that's ALL i can gurantee anyone anyway, I mean I'm due ANY minute...We are on a budget, and we can't afford to take you other to all the hotspots you (ummm...that you DEMAND). Sorry, I'm REALLY big and I can't go clubbing with you (not that I even want to) or do all the shopping you aspire.
People, please be considerate of others situations....
People, please be considerate of others situations....
Monday, August 31, 2009
Ohhhh.... Boyyy!!
Okay, I passed the praxis, I don't mean I passed by a little bit, I passed by ALOT... I did EXCELLENT.... OMFG.....I didn't study, I didn't even attempt to know the answers, and let me tell you, I did EXCELLENT......
I told myself totally thinkin I was going to fail, that if I pass this, I would go into teaching.... So here I am, 2 days before my masters education starts and I just found out I passed the praxis...
Just when I think that I got my career idea all STRAIGHTEN out, this happens...
UGH!!!!
WWYD???
I told myself totally thinkin I was going to fail, that if I pass this, I would go into teaching.... So here I am, 2 days before my masters education starts and I just found out I passed the praxis...
Just when I think that I got my career idea all STRAIGHTEN out, this happens...
UGH!!!!
WWYD???
Sunday, August 30, 2009
I'm Still Pregnant, Don't Worry
Sorry for being M.I.A., however I had nothing much to write. I was so pissed off at my abusive doctor's appointment, ughz, can you believe that a female doctor is ROUGHER then a male doctor, my poor poor lady parts...haha. Anyhow, I was 1cm dilated and 70% effaced on Monday, I was carrying a 6lb 14 oz baby at 37 weeks, imagine her size at 40 weeks if she continues the average of an oz a day, that's like a human....lol..then Wednesday morning my lovely mucus plug came out, oh yea, the whole thing (enter in sheer happiness and panic) I sat all day waiting for contractions, to which I got nadda. Oh boy!! So as I walk around here, for the start of week 3, open and thinned. I must say, I am totally ready for this munchkin to exit...lol
Friday, August 14, 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Hey... Got Something I Wanna Share =)
Of Course!! I know you wanna see belly pictures, how could I make you wait over 35 weeks!!!
We'll go in reverse to how I got so big... So without further ado...
August (to date)
July
June
Hey.... I got something else for you....
Introducting our 28 week 6 day ultrasound =)
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
What's That...
Laying across the couch this morning, I decided to give out a little stretch....
Well so did Jayda, LOL...
you should of seen my face as I felt her little body expand in my tummy... matter of fact you should of saw my tummy and the new stretch marks that have taken residence.
Well so did Jayda, LOL...
you should of seen my face as I felt her little body expand in my tummy... matter of fact you should of saw my tummy and the new stretch marks that have taken residence.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Overnight...LoL
DH: "What cha doing"
Me: "Packing my overnight bag for the hospital, which outfit do you want Jayd to wear home"
DH: "The pink one that says I love daddy"
Me: "Cool Beans, it's packed"
DH: (confused look... then turns to panic look... then a calm smile)
Me: "What ya doing babe?"
DH: (with shorts and underclothes in hand, he packs it in my bag)
DH: "Cause I'm sleeping over, I wonder what kind of food they'll serve, don't forget my toothbrush and hair gel"
When a daddy can't bare to think the mommy will spend more time with the baby then him, I call that...
- Priceless...lol
Me: "Packing my overnight bag for the hospital, which outfit do you want Jayd to wear home"
DH: "The pink one that says I love daddy"
Me: "Cool Beans, it's packed"
DH: (confused look... then turns to panic look... then a calm smile)
Me: "What ya doing babe?"
DH: (with shorts and underclothes in hand, he packs it in my bag)
DH: "Cause I'm sleeping over, I wonder what kind of food they'll serve, don't forget my toothbrush and hair gel"
When a daddy can't bare to think the mommy will spend more time with the baby then him, I call that...
- Priceless...lol
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